Rise of Volcoff

In which we realize Eye Patch is a total asshole

After resting, the group buries Allen and makes their way to Jason’s camp. When they approach the camp they are warned not to make any hostile actions and continue in to the camp. They arrive in the castle and are shown to Jason. There Jason demands to see the evidence the party has been carrying for him. It is a hand with a ring on the finger and the burned in mark of Volcoff. Jason vows to have his merry men fight in the resistance if they venture to to elvenlands an rescue his daughter. He also sends along a gunslinger named Kain to accompany them. Kain is given a medallion by Jason’s son that is to be used to call on his aid. The group is given a teleportation rock that will take them to the elvenlands and back. They are teleported outside of a the castle city. Unfortunately only Shiranui is of the Elven persuasion. Numair created a house in the forest as a safe haven that Tordek and Jasper stayed in. Numair also made disguises and they went to the castle to speak with the king after learning that Jason’s daughter was Kain’s fiance. The king denied having Jason’s daughter though he was obviously scared and made a gesture to indicate he needed help from one of Volcoff’s Admirals who stood behind him. The group then met up with the guards who told the group they couldn’t risk openly going against Volcoff but would not impede them either. Kain then called in Jason’s son and three big guys. They made a plan for Shiranui, Numair, and Kain to distract the Admiral while Jason’s son and the big guys went to the dungeon to rescue his sister. When Numair destroyed the wall to the castle, the Admiral unleashed the power of an earth elemental and created a rock wall. Numair and Allen teleported inside past the wall while Shiranui flew up to a window. The admiral then summoned three earth elementals though they were easily taken down when Delta and the boys busted in while our three heroes went to the dungeon and rescued Jason’s daughter. The Admiral then destroyed the back wall of the castle and disappeared vowing vengeance! Delta squad then took Jason’s daughter and teleported back to Jason. The group then took the stone teleporter back to Jason’s and Jason swore allegiance to the resistance and sent Kain along with them as a show of good faith. The group then traveled back through the riot city which was more or less in ruins and took the portal back to the resistance base. They then met with the council minus Eye Patch who basically gave the group a pat on the back and sent them away. The group then met with Eye Patch in a shady alleyway and gave the group information on the crown’s whereabouts. The crown is located in the dragon queen’s treasury and Eye Patch gave the group robes to disguise as dragon disciples to try and sneak in and steal the crown. They then went and traded the magical items they found and traded them for items of the same quality only in their size. They then put on the disciple robes and take a portal to the dragon lands. They venture toward the inner haven running into other dragon disciples who guide them to the haven. They travel into the dragon queen’s lair and spot the crown. Shiranui basically tells the queen that Garbiel is weakened and planning on killing her which enrages her and she takes the group in her hand but not before they steal the crown like sneak-thieves. The queen then confronts Gabriel when Numair shoots the crown at Gabriel releasing him from his bonds and a battle of epic proportions takes place which leaves the queen injured and Gabriel swears his loyalty to the cause. They then return to the council who are angry that they released Gabriel and send them away. Eye Patch then runs into the group and explains that the council is too afraid to do what needs to be done and he has cut off ties with them. He sends the, back to resistance hq and the group then decides to go on a shopping spreeeeeeeeeeeeeee! Unfortunately they were mostly broke so it was less of a spree and more of a penny pinching shopping excursion. Eye Patch then sends them to the vampire lands to collect a sword that is capable of defeating the son of light. When they arrive at the vampire mansion they speak with the vamprie lord who tells the group where to find the sword and then kills himself. Shiranui finds an envelope on his ashes which tells the tragic tale of how the vampire lord screwed up big time. The party then ventures down the beach toward the sword. They notice in the ocean there are ships with Volcoff’s insignia. They enter the shack and delve into the catacombs where they find a burned vampire who tells them the sword is in the middle of three coffins. They opened the coffin and inside was the corpse of a cleric and THE SWORD!!!! They took the sword and gave it to Tordek then left the shack. Outside the ships had gotten extremely close to land and elephants were approaching from the south. Shiranui cast invisibility on the group and they tried walking around them but the elephants arced toward them. The elephant riders asked what their intentions were in the vampire lands and when the party told them they simply wanted to leave, the elephant party let them go their merry way. On their way to the portal the saw more elephants and one particular group that were attacking a house of vampires. The party made it back to the resistance portal after three days and waited for Eye Patch to contact them.

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This is all Numair's fault

Shiranui casts invisibility on himself and Allen and they take to the roofs toward the church while Tordek and Shiranui navigate through the rioting streets toward the church. The group enters the church and Allen is accused by a low voiced woman of starting the riots and causing the death of her husband. Not wanting more trouble, Numair creates bandages to cover Allen’s face. The group enters the catacombs after being warned of a douchebag Cleric of Volcoff that cursed the catacombs for some douchebag reason. As they entered the catacombs a they are met by a booming voice that demands the groups intentions. When he learns of their non-allegiance to Volcoff the fight is on as he emerges from around the corner and reveals his form, a mini-Volcoff, or Minicoff. The fiendish human was quite strong and eventually it bested the monk Allen and struck him dead with his flail. After a lengthy battle in which priests and monks of the church were also killed, the party eventually bested the beast. Numair created a coffin and placed Allen’s body inside it and also grabbed the armor from the Minicoff. The party were shown the way out of the catacombs and traveled onward to find Jason and his merry men.

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On not being sneaky

The par-tay took a portal to the metalworks city where after being told to be inconspicuous, they noticed a child about to get his hand cut off by a group of guards. Not about to let that shit go down, Allen jumped in and offered to take the punishment in the child’s place. The guards took him to the center of the city to make an example of him when Tordek and Shiranui distracted the guards allowing the group to to escape to the child’s secret lair. The group decided to try and escape the city through the church.

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The fall of Grol

The party found the camp of mercenary men of merriment. They met with the leader of the mercenaries, Jason, who told them that Lorg had been taken to a prison. After resting at the camp, the party entered the prison to find Lorg. After fighting through guards the group found out that the leader of the prison, Lex, was actually hated by the guards and they were allowed to pass through if they promised to kill Lex. The group managed to find Lex’s office where they found a map of the complex and Allen found a parakeet. They then found Lorg who embraced his brotha in a bromantic hug that would make even the most cynical of men weep. They then ventured further into the prison and found Lex in his room. Behind them was the prison’s Golem, above them was an air elemental and in front of them was Lex. Lex told the party that Lorg was merely bait and that an army was headed toward the prison. Also that the parakeet was in fact a gnome! Cray-Cray! Our brave party managed to defeat the not bald-headed Lex and his accomplices in lame! Afterwards they found a locked box in Lex’s office and proceeded to head toward the entrance. When they neared the entrance the parakeet turned back into a gnome, although he still believed himself to be a parakeet.Unfortunately, outside of the entrance was an army of at least 300 filled with units on gryphons, Herdezal, and a giant water elemental. Numair teleported the group out of the prison to the top of the canyon where they found a nuber of gryphons. Grol jumped onto one of the gryphons and started fighting. Calcifer created a wall of fire while most of the party escaped, though Allen and Lorg stayed to make sure Grol made it. When Calcifer lowered the wall, Allen and Lorg saw Grol get impaled with a lance and fall down the canyon. Lorg jumped after him while Allen peered over the edge. Allen saw that Grol’s body had been placed into a wagon while Lorg hid under the wagon. Allen followed the army while the rest of the party made camp and decided to go after their lost comrades. The army soon came upon another army of different allegiance, all of which were female, bearing banners of Helga, an ex-follower of Volcoff. The two armies then fought while Allen and Lorg looked through the wagons for Grol. The army of women soon defeated the Volcoff fotmen and after a brief conversation, the leader of the Helga army decided to allow Allen and Lorg to have an audience with Helga. Allen and Lorg then buried Grol at the bottom of the canyon and were then transported to a marsh. Meanwhile, the rest of the party raced back to the canyon and followed the tracks of the army to find the remains of the battle and Grol’s grave. In the marsh was a small hut where Helga lived where only those who do not have evil in their hearts may enter. Unfortunately, when Allen entered, Helga told him that it was not the time for them to meet and she could not offer any help to the resistance at this time. As Allen left the hut, the leader of the Helga army told him that Lorg had run off. As Allen tried to follow him he felt a hand on his shoulder and was teleported back to the canyon in front of the rest of the party. They then returned to the resistance base and checked in with Eye-Patch General. After explaining what they needed to do to get Gabriel’s amulet and what happened to Lorg and Grol, General sent the party to go find Jason and his merry men and Allen leaves the Gnome in the hands of the General to deliver to the Elven Lands.

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At War With Ourselves

The group wakes up Grol and he demands they track down Lorg who teleported out of the town. Numair cast a divination spell to try and discern where Lorg was. They found out that Lorg had been kidnapped and was in the vatican witch was north east was the dragon valley. Allen set on fire and flew through the cave, and ended up in the resistance town. The party gathered together at the town and Shiranui informed the guards about the burning town. After grabbing some supplies they headed through another cave and popped out in the vampire beach. They run into a vampire, surprise surprise, and proceed to beat the vampire into DEATH! Unfortunately, Tordek and Grol were dominated by the vampire. Fortunately Allen the Powerful, also known as Allen the Bad-Ass, knocked the already weakened Grol the Enraged, also known as Grol the Jerk-Wad, out with a solid punch. Soon after the party knocked Tordek the Drunken, also known as Tordek the Mighty, down like a dog. Meanwhile, Numair the Wise, also known as Numair the “Not Evil”, trapped the vampire’s gaseous form in a construct box.

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Fighting Soldiers That For All We Know, Have Wives and Children

The captain of the soldiers created a magical fog obscuring the group’s vision. There was much battle! Lorg fell under an enchantment and ran out of the battle with Issun cahsing after him. Grol charged into battle and was mauled by the soldiers and was burned by a wall of fire created by Numair. Allen tumbled through the army and knocked the captain unconscious. After the rest of the soldiers were taken out by the party, Issun returned without Lorg. They began interrogating the captain. “Not evil” Numair began using drugs on the captain. Calcifur took over Allen’s body and started taking the captain out but after the party argued with him, he left the building and Allen regained control. After gathering little information from the captain, Numair, Issun, and Shiranui left him in the hall with an addiction to the drug which he would keep taking until he died. Meanwhile, Tordek goes in search of the the dwarf Harry, of Harry’s Big Brass Balls. You know the one. When he reaches the store Tordek finds that Harry is alive and well and after sharing his recent adventure, Harry gives Tordek magical armor! Hoorah!

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Fetch Quests FTW!

The party rested inside of a portal created by Numair in order to regain their strength. They then entered a door leading into a room with a suit of armor chained to a throne attached to demonic looking pillars. The armor soon revealed itself to be Gabriel and the amulet of confinement was inside of his soul. The only way to free the amulet was to kill him. Gabriel told the party he would help them if they could break the chains that bind him. The only way to break the chains was to reclaim a missing piece of his armor from the Queen of Dragons. Gabriel offered them some form of assistance if they brought him his son, the human leader of the Cult of Gabriel. The party ventured back through the dungeon to retrieve Gabriel’s son. When they came across the staircase with poisoned darts, Allen dodged the darts like a boss while Tordek tripped flat on his face. When they got back to the cult, the human leader told the party that he would not see his father but offered his son, Issun to go in his stead. As the party ventures back into the dungeon, Issun fails jumping across a pit and falls into the pit previously filled with wyverns. Tordek jumps into the pit after him and spots two wyverns. The rest of the party soon rescues Issun and they enter Gabriel’s chamber. Gabriel then takes Issun and after making Issun go limp, tosses him aside. After warning the party of the dangers of the fire elemental, he then offers the his sword, and after grabbing the hilt, Tordek erupts into flames and the sword and fire seem to battle for control. A spark soon shoots out of Tordek and after pushing Shiranui aside, Allen attempts to stamp it out. His leg then shoots on fire and disappears, with Allen believing he’s destroyed it. The party then leaves the dungeon and enters the town one last time. The human leader then told the party that he would fight with them against Volcoff when the time came. The party then takes off in their caravan. Allen then introduces himself to Issun who is ravaged by golden ice. Allen announces that Issun is evil and the party then asks whata da hella is goin’ on here?!?! Allen’s right arm then sets on fire and Allen is freaked the crap out. He then hears the voice of Calcifur in his head and after a bit of an introduction Allen is left feeling dumbfounded. The party decides to keep an eye on Issun and travels to Ghulheim. When they arrive at the gates the city is on fire! Calcifer then gives Allen a temporary right arm made of fire and sucked up all of the fire on the gates. Torek then cut through the gate and entered the town. They get into the city hall and find a small army of soldiers all fitted with the seal of Volcoff. Shiranui shoots a fireball into the room and battle begins!!!

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Near death in Dark Places

The group rested in an extra-dimensional plane and decided to split up. Allen, Shiranui, and Lorg went to test the three doors across from the pit while Grol, Numair, and Tordek went down the staircase. Shiranui, Allen, and Lorg opened the first door and found a room filled with magical darkness that couldn’t be penetrated with light. The next door had a hole leading down a slide and Allen threw Numair’s pretentious Crystal down the hole. The third room had a Warforged Construct which Allen and Shiranui dispatched with ease. Shiranui then decided to go into the dark room and was locked inside. He tried to run around the room to figure out how large it was and in doing so lost track of where the door was. The room then began filling with water as Shiranui tried casting lighting bolts around the room while Allen tried breaking down the door. After a very climatic and nerve wrecking ordeal, Allen finally thrust his middle finger in death’s face by breaking the door and releasing a wave of water and Shiranui. Lorg immediately healed Shiranui and Shiranui decided to cast a flight spell on himself and ventured down the hole. Meanwhile, Grol, Numair, and Tordek ventured down the staircase. After proceeding down the stairs the door behind them closed and locked and they were struck by poisoned darts. After racing down the hallway they came across a large room filled with urns as the door behind them locked. In front of them laid a large door with three keyholes. Numair created a wall of sonic energy to attack the door. Shiranui popped out of the hole into the large room followed soon by Allen and Lorg. The door crumbled beneath the sonic assault revealing a winged demon woman! She spoke in a language only Numair understood and after trying and failing to reason with her, she drew her sword and SHIT. WENT. DOWN! The demon grappled Grol and flew into the air. Numair gave Allen and Tordek the ability to fly and they took to the skies! The demon tried to drop Grol but he latched onto her leg. Unfortunately he couldn’t hold on and tumbled like a grade A pro. The demon summoned three demon minions on the ground floor below her as Tordek and Allen fought her in the sky. Allen managed to trip the demon and struck her to the ground where she died of a broken heart at never having been kissed. Poor her. Meanwhile Grol smiled with glee at having something to hit. Numair became greedy and took the demon’s longbow midway through the battle. The party eventually bested the three demons and to avoid showing his true evil, Numair gave the bow to Shiranui. And there was looting galore!

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Adventure in the Lands of Gabriel

Numair Salmalin and Allen read through The Four Elemental Brothers and realized Tordek was more than likely possesed by the fire demon Calcifer. Numair Salmalin spent the night reading through the rest of the book and in the morning the party set off in their caravan. The caravan traveled through the Green Jungle. While minding his own beeswax creating a scroll, Shiranui was shot in the shoulder with an arrow! The party spotted a large ogre standing in the middle of the road and two of their horses were shot down with arrows. The party had ventured into the Land of Gabriel and were told by disembodied voices to turn and take a different path but after some reasoning the voices told them they had been given permission to venture further. The caravan followed the ogre until it sank into the ground and short hooded figures dropped out of nearby trees each carrying bows. They are taken down into a city of Kobolds all following the rule of an old human who confirms to the party that the amulet is real and gives them directions to the dungeon where Gabriel lies guarding the amulet. They are told multiple times by multiple people they will definitely not survive the ordeal. They rested outside the dungeon and the next morning read the door which said, " In order to reach Gabriel’s shackles, only the brave may pass our trials" Grol knocks on the door 10 times and the door opens. Shiranui lights a torch and the party enters the dark abyssssssss! They enter the dungeon and come upon two paths and a placard that informs the party that one path leads to death and the other leads to death by Gabriel. Shamandalie and Crystal are sent to the left path and come upon a room with three doors. They then go down the right path and and set off a tripwire falling into a pit killing the weasel. R.I.P Shamandalie. The party ventured down the left path and Shiranui immediately opened the center door revealing a flesh golem which fell prone. Numair created a wall of fire dealing damage and slowing the golem eventually felling the beast! They then opened the left and right doors. To the right was a hallway and to the left was a staircase heading down. The Crystal, Grol, Lorg, Shiranui, and Numair head down the hallway. The ground beneath them drops and Grol, Shiranui, and Numair fall down a a pit knocking Shiranui unconscious while Lorg jumps to the other side of the hole. Numair sends Crystal up the side of the pit with rope and Lorg jumped clear over the pit. Meanwhile Grol notices something stirring down in the pit with them. Lorg, and Allen jump down the slide of doom to reach their less fortunate comrades using Shiranui as a cushion. Numair created a wall of fire revealing two Wyverns who flew up and started their aerial assault. Numair damaged one of the Wyvern’s charisma forcing it to become comatose falling on Shiranui. The remaining Wyvern was finally bested by a raging Grol.

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Lions, Dinos, and Bears! Oh my!

The adventurers ventured forth into the jungle and soon stumbled upon a bear, lion, and a T-rex. Unfortunately the party failed to notice the dinosaur and rammed the caravan into the T-rex, killing two of their horses and flinging Shiranui, Grol, and Allen out of the Caravan with Shiranui landing at the T-rex’s feet. Allen and an enraged Grol slayed the lion after both taking a fair share of damage. Shiranui was swallowed whole by the dino and Numair damaged it’s charisma forcing it to become comatose. Numair forced the T-rex into the future in an effort to give Shiranui time for us to save him. The bear in an act of bad-assery mauled Allen and grappled him. Grol in an act of douche-baggery missed hitting the bear and cut off Allen’s right arm. Tordek decapitated the bear finishing the beast off. The group readied themselves as the T-Rex reappeared in front of them. Suddenly fire bursted forth from Tordek and melts the belly of the T-Rex. After Shiranui exited the T-rex the group tried to confront Tordek but he didn’t believe that there had been any flames. After moving the corpses the group set out again to find the encampment. They came across five hooded men who showed them the secret entrance to the encampment, Deepwood. There they were told the way to get to the Amulet of Confinement and gathered supplies for the journey. Shiranui went to the library for scroll supplies while Numair and Allen look for information on Tordeks condition. Numair finds a book called The Four Elemental Brothers.

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